You’ve seen the show Jeapordy right? You know how it works. You’re given an answer and then you have to ask the question. Okay. Let’s play a round, it will be fun!
I’ll take Weather In Canada for $500, Alex!
Answer: Weather that makes you want to throw yourself off a bridge.
When I was pregnant with Hayley I started noticing that I would become forgetful or do silly things, like the time I took a package of hot dogs and put them in the cupboard instead of the fridge (and luckily I realized my mistake right away instead of wondering what that smell was three weeks later). I figured it was just because my brain was too busy being distracted.
When she was born, and then when Breanna was born, I would do similar dumb things like walking into the same room three times before remembering what I wanted to get. I chalked it up to being sleep deprived and in a constant state of confusion due to only getting three or four hours of broken sleep each night.
It’s not pregnancy brain. It’s not sleep deprived brain. Hayley is four and a half years old, Breanna is 16 months old, and I’m still doing things that make me dig for excuses for why I am a moron.
In the past month or so I have done the following things:
I’ve often hoped that it would clear up and I would stop with the pregnancy/placenta/sleepless brain tomfoolery but it appears that it’s still hanging in there. I visited my parents recently and I never noticed my mom pouring coffee into the plants or accidentally eating her napkin while thinking it was a sandwich so maybe there’s hope that my brain will return to normal when the girls are in their late 20s and early 30s. Let’s hope I don’t get confused and wander into traffic before then.
Are you a breastfeeding mother? Do you work and pump? Do you sometimes travel and try to maintain that breastfeeding relationship? Do you rely on understanding and accomodating hotel staff to help you out? Then make sure you read How to write an apology letter where my friend Casey explains how she was denied access to a room to pump while at a conference (but she WAS offered a bathroom, how charming).
We survived Easter!
It was a little touch and go on Saturday night; Hayley was exhausted so she fell asleep within 20 minutes, which is practically unheard of around here lately. As an aside, the funniest thing she said that night was in regards to getting ready for bed. She usually sleeps in just her underwear but then she decided to put on a nightgown and told me, “I don’t want the Easter bunny to see me naked!”
First we set up a place setting for the Easter Bunny/Peeping Tom by putting out a handful of baby carrots and a cup of water. Then the kids went to bed and I hid the loot around the living room and boiled some eggs to prepare a surprise breakfast for them in the morning. Breanna woke up once and then later I was going to bed since it was about 12:15. Unfortunately, in her excitement to get to bed, Hayley forgot to pee and so she woke up right then and was way too antsy to go back to sleep. She ended up staying awake until almost 3:30 am! Yeesh.
When it was time to get up (at least they both slept until 8:30), I wondered if Breanna would understand what to do and wouldn’t you know, she was the first one to find an egg. She didn’t really get the concept of looking for chocolate, but I had also hidden a dozen brightly colored plastic eggs (the kind you apparently fill with candy except I don’t because how much freakin’ candy do two kids need?) and she was all over finding those and dramatically throwing them into her basket. Or across the room.
Once they had both found everything – and Hayley did a great job of letting Breanna find things too even if she saw them first – Hayley had a couple of pieces of chocolate and then ate one of the bunny boiled eggs. She was amused that the food coloring had gone through the shell and turned the actual egg pink too.
Happy Easter everyone!
This morning, I bent to pick Breanna up to lift her over something that was in her way. I do it all the time. Today, I did it in an awkward movement and as I swung her over the obstacle, something in my back – just under my left shoulder blade – snapped. If I was a cartoon you would have heard a “sproing!” noise. It hurt but not so badly that I couldn’t move. I was whimpering about it but still walking around so I figured it was okay.
Since George was home I asked him to make the coffee so I could just sit at my desk and try to recuperate for a minute but shortly after that Breanna walked over to me and mumbled while shoving her fingers into her throat, which is how she tells me she would like me to put some food in there. In hindsight this was incredibly stupid, but rather than alerting George that she was hungry and asking for help I decided I could lift her into her high chair if I was careful and bent my knees. After all, it hurt but not in an incapacitating way.
Right. I got her half way up and my back went into a spasm. I have never reacted to pain so instantly, not even in labor; I nearly dropped her, got her back to the floor, and everything in my vision started to turn brown. I told George I thought I might faint and that I felt like I might even throw up, and he immediately sent me to bed and took care of everyone else.
I’m amazed I didn’t actually pass out on my way down the hall but I managed to lurch and shuffle my way to the bedroom and I collapsed – carefully – onto the bed with a plastic bin cradled in my arms because I was so positive that I really would throw up. I’m so glad I didn’t because I was so terrified that if I did it would cause more back spasms.
I never managed to fall asleep but I did lie there, curled up in a position that didn’t hurt too badly, and I sort of dozed a little. I also managed to lift my head up enough to take the Advil that George brought in for me. At 11:30 I was finally able to carefully drag myself out to have some coffee and breakfast.
I haven’t picked anyone up for the rest of the day. I couldn’t imagine putting Breanna into the crib tonight because my back couldn’t have handled it so at bedtime I just coaxed her up onto the bed and she’s sleeping there; even if I could lift her up I know my back couldn’t deal with lowering her over the side and onto the mattress. I’m just glad she went to sleep easily.
George did a great job of letting me relax and did all the dishes (twice!), picked up the living room, and picked up Breanna any time she needed to get into her high chair or just wanted to be held. I was so lucky he was here today or I would have been royally screwed. All I had to do was take a hot shower to further soothe my back, and I made supper which was no big feat since we just had grilled cheese, tomato soup, and fries (note to self – make more tomato soup, Breanna loves it). I even managed to wash the dishes up quickly afterwards because I had gotten a chance to really rest my back most of the day.
It still hurts now but two more Advils are taking the edge off and even though it’s not technically helping in any medicinal way, the Earl Grey tea and cereal I’m snacking on are comforting too. I think I’ll go see if watching “Blood Diamond” is therapeutic as well.
Most people have had to deal with mold at some point but it can be dangerous if if gets out of hand. It can lurk in your bathroom where it gets humid post-shower, it can seep in your window tracks, it can even be under your sink. It’s not just gross, it can cause health problems such as cold-like symptoms, headaches, and even aggravate asthma and allergies. If you think you might be dealing with toxic mold in your home, you can check out a place like PA Mold Testing to find out more information and how they can help. Take it seriously, because mold is not a joke!
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Just to distract me from the previous post and the fact that it is SNOWING, here are two videos of Breanna being cute.
A recent habit that she has developed is that she’ll gasp loudly at any abrupt noises. I managed to get her doing this while she was playing with the baby monitor which was in need of new batteries.
The second video shows her little fish face that she makes for kisses. She is especially fond of giving kisses to Hayley because she loves her big sister so much. Also, you get to hear my voice really well, which is sort of appalling to me so I’ll try not to think about it too much.
I know. The cuteness is kind of overwhelming isn’t it?
It is SNOWING right now. Actually, it’s been snowing on and off all day but earlier it was still warm enough that it melted the second it hit the ground. Right now I can see it sticking to the grass.
I am not impressed. Sadly, I’m also stupid because I do this every single year. Every year, the calendar says it’s Spring and then slowly the snow melts away, the temperatures rise, and I think, “Yes! Winter is over!” And then it snows. Bah.
I had been hopeful enough that I actually put my winter boots away. If this snow doesn’t melt overnight I’m going to have to drag them back out again.
Keith Richards confessed that he once mixed some of his dad’s ashes with cocaine and snorted them. He says his dad wouldn’t care and that it went down reasonably well. He snorted his FATHER’S DEAD ASHES. It may take me a few hours to stop convulsing in horror.