Monthly Archives: January 2011

Pretty daughters

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It took me years to like the way I looked. Growing up I was a teenager with thick glasses, out-of-control hair (thick hair is wonderful but only if you know what to do with it; as a teen I most certainly had no clue how to manage it), zero fashion sense, and worst of all absolutely no self-confidence in the way I looked. Any time I imagined myself in some situation, the first thing I would think is to pretend I was pretty. I pretended to be pretty, I never felt pretty.

My parents told me I was but parents are supposed to do that. Parents aren’t supposed to say, “yes dear, you’re ugly but you have many other charming qualities” so I didn’t buy it when they said that.

Sad as it is to admit, it took something physical to change my perceptions of myself. I wish I could say that I transcended the need to be pretty, a need that is ingrained into not only our society but society around the world; what is deemed attractive depends on culture and history but whether you’re talking about the 18th century or today you’ll always find a woman who wanted to look good. But it was indeed something physical that finally made me like what looked back out of the mirror. It was my first pair of contact lenses at the age of 17.

Over the years I guess that I’ve found a combination of acceptance and approval within myself. I don’t stare in the mirror all day long sighing with joy but I don’t avert my eyes either. It’s a balance. But even at the age of 36, even with a year’s worth of yoga under my belt – where acceptance of who and what and where you are is a strong theme – the word “pretty” still echoes over and over from time to time. It’s amazing how deep a neurosis over physical appearance can run.

I hadn’t planned on writing all of that, I guess it’s like the typing version of vomiting all over the internet (which is a pretty good description of blogging in general). All I really meant to do was share this amazing video that Caitlin from Operation Beautiful posted on Twitter this morning. I don’t put my feminist hat on too often but this video speaks volumes and it brought me to tears. Not only is it important to watch for yourself, if you have daughters or ever might have them then I think you need to see this.

(There is one moment of swearing so you might want to view it first before watching it WITH your daughters.)

Every once in awhile I post something deeply personal and I get ready to cringe in hindsight so I reserve the right to edit this post later if I suddenly get all embarrassed. Meanwhile, I’d love to hear your thoughts on the clip.

Getting scientific on a stupidly cold morning

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Here’s the thing. I’m Canadian and I have been Canadian my whole life. Not only that, I live in Montreal which is an area of the country known for brutally cold winters and large amounts of snow. I’m used to it in the sense that this is just the way our weather is. Our summers make you melt with the humidity and our winters make you wonder what settlers were thinking when they looked around this stupid frozen tundra and said, “yep, looks like home to me!”

That doesn’t mean I like it. I’ve always said that I live in the wrong place because I’m not a fan of extreme temperatures. I like hot summer days but I don’t like suck-out-your-will-to-live humidity. I don’t mind a little cold and some snow but I don’t like days where your nose freezes shut five seconds after you walk out the door.

The latter is what we’re dealing with today. This morning it was -36C which is the equivalent of -32F for those of you who have not yet embraced the metric system. It doesn’t matter which system you use, it all translates to “bloody fucking cold” in Celsius and Fahrenheit alike. In the short time I was outside today my thighs were so cold that it took a good 20 minutes for them to warm up.

Hydro Quebec was also asking people to please not overuse electricity in order to not over-tax the power grids because obviously no one wants a power failure on a day like this. I laughed when I heard that because yes, it’s important to turn off lights that you aren’t using and maybe wait a bit before running major appliances but convincing people not to jack up the heat isn’t going to happen.

Anyway! The other day I saw this video of a woman up in Yellowknife (that’s in the Northwest Territories in case you were wondering) on a -30C day. She took boiling water and threw it into the air where it instantly turned into steam. I mean INSTANTLY.

I figured if our weather today must be stupidly cold I might as well get some enjoyment out of it. I tried it too, although I didn’t feel like bundling up myself and Breanna to go outside. We ended up just throwing it out the window in the stairwell instead and it totally worked. Luckily George is home so he came with us and held the camera.

Can we fast forward to spring now?

In a nutshell

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I knew I hadn’t gotten around to updating for awhile but I hadn’t realized just how long it had been until my sister emailed me to see if I was okay. When your own family member (especially one who has a tendency to skimp on blogging herself, ahem!) notices your unplanned leave of absence you know it’s been awhile. Obviously I can’t catch you up on every single day, nor would you want to know every last detail, but I can update on some of the bigger moments since we flipped the calendar to 2011.

We celebrated New Year’s Eve at home which is nothing new for me. I’m not really into going to parties or bars on that day although I have always said I’d love to do Times Square for the ball drop just once before I die. What was different this year was getting to celebrate with George. The thing with being a musician is that it’s not unusual to be booked for a gig on a night like New Year’s Eve. Luckily for me it didn’t happen this year so for the first time since Hayley was three months old we got to ring in the new year together.

We kept it low-key. We introduced the kids to E.T. and they both loved the movie (Hayley was so enthralled that she brought home a book about him from the library this week!). We also enjoyed some appetizers, most of which were Indian, so I was very happy indeed, and the girls drank ginger ale from champagne glasses while George and I had some red wine. We hung out in the living room until Dick Clark’s Rockin’ New Year’s Eve came on. It’s a tradition of mine to watch that and even though Ryan Seacrest has taken over most of the hosting duties I still can’t help but put it on. I had a wee fangirl moment while watching New Kids on the Block, what can I say?

Family

This was also the first year that Breanna managed to stay awake until past midnight. Last year she held on until 11:30 and then passed out cold on the couch. She was very proud to be able to celebrate fully this time.

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On January 8th we had another first; we left the girls with the first babysitter they’ve ever had that isn’t related to them. Our friend was celebrating his birthday at a nearby bar so the girls had a sleepover at their friend’s house and her cousin babysat them. He’s a really good kid and they all love him so it worked out well. It was Breanna’s first sleepover ever and she did very well.

Music

At the bar we listened to some live music and had a few drinks, and it was fun. We stayed until a little after 1 am and then finally headed home after the band finished their second set. It was very weird to come home without any kids but I was so tired that I fell asleep five seconds after I hit my pillow.

Successful sleepover

The next morning we went over to pick up the girls and stayed for breakfast. Breakfast is probably my favorite meal ever, but I’m not a fan of actually making big breakfasts (which is why pancakes are usually supper here). Having someone else do it makes me very happy, which is why it’s awesome that George frequently makes bacon and fixes up egg and cheese “McMuffins” on weekends. At their house I enjoyed a big plate of French toast and bacon and home fries and it was a good way to start an otherwise very lazy day.

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The biggest thing that has happened since I’ve been horribly neglectful towards my blog is that on Friday (this past one, the 14th) I had an actual professional photo gig lined up. A friend of mine from the school does marketing for a local restaurant (the food is fabulous, if you live in the area you should check it out) and they needed a photographer to capture some fun moments. They had a lot of nice shots of food but no ambiance photos of people enjoying the food or just having a drink at the bar. That’s where I came in.

Let me tell you something: All work should be as much fun as that night was. I got there at about 6:30 just so I could test the lighting and figure out some good places to set up. The actual shoot started at 7 when my friend got there along with four young girls who were willing to model for me along with any clients who were okay with being photographed (only one table said no, everyone else was happy to pose). I had fully intended to shoot for one hour. At the most I thought I might extend to an hour and a half, wrapping up at 8:30. It was 9:40 when George picked me up. I was having such a blast that we just kept going and going.

I took almost 400 photos and managed to whittle them down to 165 to present to my friend for her perusal. I’ve been asked to keep my photos under wraps until they officially launch their campaign on February 1st so as hard as it is, I’m sitting on my hands (figuratively speaking, otherwise it would be difficult to type!). All I know is I’m very excited because these will be used in campaign on the restaurant’s website, their Facebook page, AskMen.com, and Elle Quebec.

Other than that, the only other news around here is of the less fun variety. Starting on Sunday, Breanna quickly developed a nasty gastro and it has since spread. I am not feeling well at all today (I even canceled going to a Governing Board meeting up at the school which I don’t like to do), and Hayley started coming down with it tonight. I’ve already called the school and left a message to say that she’s not coming in, that way we can all just sleep tomorrow morning. I know exactly what she has, there’s no point in waking her up to see if she can go in.

Hopefully it will pass quickly and we’ll all be feeling 100% by the weekend!

(Photos from New Year’s Eve can be seen here; meanwhile more photos from our night out are here.)